By: Allen Cardoza
(Note: Article written for “Your Teen Magazine” Fall 2011 issue – www.yourteenmag.com
After reading Michael’s article, I can understand how many parents may feel that he is an over-controlling, overprotective father. But, controversial as it may seem, I am in agreement with Michael. As a private detective whose company does a great deal of tracking down runaway children, I have seen it all.
Michael is correct in his belief that we live in a world that is nothing like the one we grew up in. It is, in reality, a dangerous world, full of unexpected surprises for naïve people.
Rather than provide an analysis of his parenting style or even a recommendation of best practices on child-rearing, I want to share some information I’ve gathered over the years so that you can come to your own conclusions.
I will tell you about what can happen to children who escape parental supervision. Unfortunately, it is not only unsupervised children that can find themselves victims of exploitation.
Why I Specialize In Rescuing Children
When I first got started as a private investigator, one of my early clients was a frantic mother who hired me to locate her missing daughter. Although, the parents were divorced, I was told that the father supported my mission to find their daughter. Additionally, I was told that both parents agreed that once I brought her back home, she would go to a specialized drug rehab program.
Since children generally don’t leave paper traces like adults—rent receipts, telephone bills, and credit card statements—the best way to find them is to use the old gumshoe methods made popular on detective television shows.
My leads finally led me to a party in a quiet neighborhood. Since it was already dark, I set up surveillance underneath a grove of trees and watched a girl’s party, perhaps a birthday bash.
When the party was breaking up, the parents, mainly fathers, began showing up to take their daughters home.
Watching from a distance with binoculars, I saw a girl who fit the description of the one I was trying to find. I was surprised to see that her father had come to pick her up—and concluded that he was actually harboring the daughter.
Following them to a trailer park, I quietly walked up to the side of the trailer they had entered. Looking through the window, I was shocked to see the middle aged man having sex with what appeared to be a 15-year-old girl.
Later, I found out that this was the wrong girl and that the father was sincere in his desire to find his missing daughter. However, the realization of how I had completely misinterpreted the entire evening distressed me. In fact, the recognition of what was really going on was a turning point in my own life: I decided to commit my life to putting an end to the exploitation of children.
The Manipulation of Children
On another case, I traced a 14-year-old runaway girl who disappeared from a mall in her home town, to a location over one thousand miles from her home. It turned out that she had gone onto a Vampire fantasy website where a 19-year-old male told her to go to the mall at a specific time and date to meet. She was found approximately four months later living with the 19-year-old in a shabby apartment with all the windows covered.
Some Frightening Statistics
If you still think Michael is taking too many precautions with his daughter, here are some frightening statistics about children:
- The National Network for Youth estimates that 2.5 million runaway young people are living on U.S. streets today.
- The U.S. Department of Justice estimates that one in seven kids between the ages of 10 and 18 run away at some point.
- According to estimates of the U.S. State Department, the Human Rights Center at the University of California, Berkeley, and the University of Pennsylvania there are from 100,000 to 300,000 American children involved in commercial sexual exploitation.
Revisiting Michael’s Situation
When you think back on the steps Michael is taking as a parent, he goes beyond monitoring their telephone and Internet activities. He makes the young men who are trying to goad his daughter into promiscuity responsible for their actions by contacting the boy’s parents. This is a much better way to handle it than taking it into his own hands.
In my opinion, Michael is an excellent parent and if he appears to be taking extreme measures, it is only because we live in extreme times. Think about it for a moment— all it takes is one covert date with a person that she meets online to draw her into a nightmare. Predators initially use charm and bribery to meet young people before using coercion to keep them captives. Since the exploitation of children is more common than most parents think, I champion Michael’s perspective. It makes sense to keep your kids safe by monitoring their favorite communication devices and meeting their friends.
Michael recognizes the importance of good communication with his children. And if I had to guess, I would say his children, if not now, then surely when they get older will recognize that his actions come out of his uncompromising love for them. I acknowledge him as a man committed to ensuring the safety of his family.
Mr. Cardoza is the owner of West Shield Investigations and President of West Shield Adolescent Services. He is also host of the radio show; Answers for the Family, which can be heard on WWW.LATALKRADIO.COM
